Welcome To My New Life Fighting A Disease I've Never Heard Of Before....... Ankylosing Spondylitis

  Last night my hip was throbbing with pain. Another hallmark pain of the Ankylosing Spondylitis disease I live with daily. I took my nighttime medications and as I lay in bed awaiting relief, I thought about contentment. What is contentment to me personally?   I thought about all the materialistic items I own. My home, car, land, and sentimental possessions all passed through my thoughts. Then I thought about my early childhood years. I remembered all those loved ones who have passed on and what an impact they made in my life. I truly have been blessed with some wonderful people through the years. That leads me to the friends and family I have today. I know if I was in need, they would drop everything and rush to my side. That is a priceless treasure. I would consider myself rich to have such people as my support system.   As I continue thinking, I hear my oldest son's laughter in the living room. He has always had an infectious laughter. I smile to myself. My childr...

  Frustration.... such a little word but it carries so much meaning. Frustration, it is what I've felt for the past week, dealing with medical insurance renewal. Yes, it's that time of year again, choose a plan. If only it was that simple.    Having a rheumatic autoimmune disease, Ankylosing Spondylitis, entails many doctors and many medicines. Therefore, I need an insurance plan that covers a majority of what or whom I need to fight this disease. It is no easy feat to find the "perfect" plan. There actually are no perfect plans available to me.   I resort to finding the insurance plan that covers the specialty drugs I need. Luckily, that plan also has my primary general physician, my neurologist, and my opthamologist included as in-network doctors. The only doctor it lacks is my rheumatologist. Oh, and it also lacks coverage for the folic acid I need to take daily to combat the side effects of the chemotherapy drug. The chemo drug makes my hair fall out, unless ...

  Yesterday I got a call no one wants to receive. I picked up my ringing phone at 2:05 pm. I heard my husband's voice on the other end of the line. He sounded a bit different. I immediately knew something was wrong. That's when I heard the terrifying words, I've been in a wreck. My stomach dropped and my heart began pounding. My first response was "are you ok?". My husband said, he thought he was okay. He said a truck reversed in the road, because apparently it missed a driveway. My husband had stopped in the road waiting for the truck to proceed. Next thing my husband knew the truck backed right into the front of our Mitsubishi Galant.    I knew my husband was okay and talking to me, waiting for the police to arrive. I should have been relieved but I began shaking severely. I sometimes experience this shakiness with no onset occurrence. I wanted to go to my husband but I could barely walk due to the shaking. I definitely didn't think I should drive. Luckily...

  I have been steadily decluttering my home. It amazes me what we have acquired during 26 years in this home. I think we become blind to items when we see them daily. I cleaned a huge contractor size trash bag of clothes and miscellaneous items out of my oldest son's bedroom and closet. My trouble is sometimes I have an emotional bond to my kids childhood items. I remember how cute they looked wearing certain clothes or how attached they were to certain toys. The funny thing is when I ask my kids if they want to keep the item, most of the time they said "no". I was shocked when they first began telling me to donate items. I finally realized I wasn't hanging onto the items for their memories, it was for my memories.    One day I watched a lady on YouTube, she was downsizing and decluttering. She recommended the book "The Magic of Tidying Up".  Some people may recognize it as the Kon Mari method. I first checked out the ebook version from my local library. I...

  I'm not sure if it's just me or if everyone experiences this, but there are days I don't want to leave the house. It can be days before a scheduled appointment or task, that I begin to dread the thought of going. There are days that I hurt and ache too much to go anywhere. Those aren't the days I'm describing. It's just a mounting sense of dread that holds me back. I can schedule something and even look forward to that event, but as the event draws closer my eagerness turns to apprehension. My mind is consumed with "should I cancel" or "maybe I can leave early". I begin to question myself as to why I even scheduled the event in the first place.    I had my annual mammogram scheduled for 2:30 yesterday. Last Friday, I began thinking maybe I should cancel. My thoughts were, I have had a mammogram every year, so I probably could put it off until next year. I mean all my prior mammograms have been clear, no lumps or cysts. Plus, my mom doesn...

  Thanksgiving is a wonderful time to reflect on our many blessings. It is also a time to cherish family gatherings. We celebrated Thanksgiving at our home on Friday. Thursday was not an option due to my oldest son's work schedule. On Saturday we were invited to the home of my daughter's in-laws to eat Thanksgiving dinner with them. We truly enjoyed both days. Each was filled with much laughter and more food than we could possibly eat.   I was thinking back to my childhood Thanksgivings. My mother cooked on a wood cookstove during my early childhood years. I can not imagine cooking a turkey that way. I remember mom would have to keep an eye on the wood, not putting in too much, but enough to keep the oven temperature stable. We had running water from a well. However, we had no hot water heater, so there was always a big canner of water sitting on one end of that stovetop. Mom always knew where the stovetop was the hottest and moved her pots and pans around accordingly. At th...

  Saturday night was torturous. I rolled and turned all night. My hips and lower back were in severe pain. I think, as a friend suggested, I may have overdone myself. Also, I have been noticing my weekly Monday dose of Cosentyx has me feeling wonderful until Friday or Saturday. I assume that's why my doctor is having me do a five week loading dose. Fingers crossed when I begin my monthly injection it will be effective for the full month.    Monday morning I was psyched to get my injection. Exactly as the prior two weeks, by midday I felt so much more energetic. My husband took some vacation days from work this week. He and I have had a productive start to our week.   My youngest son will be having a birthday soon. He wants a new bedroom, since his sister got married last July we have an extra empty room. My husband and I thought a good birthday present would be to remodel the room my son wants to move into. Our money has been tight since I had to give up my job l...