One Good Day Equals A Bad Day

  Yesterday my mom called to chat. She had been to visit my sister. Mom mentioned my sister was cleaning her bathroom walls. Which got me to thinking, I haven't washed my bathroom walls in such a long time I don't even remember it.

  My clean freak of a mom would croak if she knew that. However, when I was employed I just didn't have the energy to do much housework. Basically I came home, fixed my kids a quick bite to eat, took a shower, and went straight to bed. I typically was in bed by 8 pm. I know that is crazy early but I had to be up every morning at 4:55 a.m. for work. Plus as most of you with anklosing spondylitis can relate, I had some nights of rolling and turning. Hip pain, rib pain, neck pain, and burning feet are my worst nighttime AS visitors. I wish I could be one of you super woman who work a job, have a spotless house, and are moms. I applaud each of you. I have many times felt such disappointment in myself because I can't keep it all up. My family deserves so much more than I can give most days. Ankylosing Spondylitis doesn't care how much it costs me in self worth. No wonder we deal with depression and anxiety.

  Back to my bathroom walls....I took all my pictures down and moved everything to the hallway. I got some hot water with Pine Sol and I washed down every wall. I am almost ashamed to tell you how filthy that water was when I emptied it. I had no idea my walls were that dirty. They looked clean or so I thought. Haha maybe I just don't see what I want to avoid! Cleaning the walls boosted my mood, so I tried to scrub my bathtub. That entails me getting on my knees by the tub and leaning in to scrub it. I don't know if any of you have arthritis in your knees, I have osteoarthritis in both of mine. Let me tell you, after a minute the shooting pains in my knees were so bad I had to drag myself up with the help of my toilet! Not a pretty sight! I know my husband has just sat down in the living room so I yelled to ask if he could possibly scrub the tub for me. To my surprise, my teenage son says he'll do it for me. He did an awesome job. I love Magic Erasers to scrub my tub. My son practically wore one down to a shred cleaning that bathtub. Oh, and just to clarify I do regularly clean my toilet, sink, tub, and floor. It was only the walls that were forgotten.

  After my son completed cleaning the tub, I proceeded to clean all the fixtures. I hung a new shower curtain. I mopped the floors and put down a new rug I bought at Kirkland's. It is thick and absolutely the best bathroom rug I've ever had. It feels like you're walking on clouds. Kirkland's is a favorite store of mine. The rug I bought was on clearance for $14.97. Worth every penny! I always check out the clearance section at every store I visit. Great deals waiting to be had. I ended Saturday feeling so accomplished and satisfied.

  This morning however is a very different story. I woke about 8 a.m. because I needed to do some cooking for our church homecoming. Oh, my goodness! Getting out of bed was horrible. My legs from my knees down feel like the bone is breaking with each step. My lower back is on fire. My shoulder blades have knifes going through them and my neck is very loudly crunching when I turn my head. So much for feeling accomplished. I make it into my very clean smelling bathroom. That wonderfully plush rug is the only thing that feels good to me right then.

  I have my morning handful of assorted medicines with a cup of coffee. Mom calls to ask if I'm getting my cooking done for church. I begin to explain my body aches but mom isn't one to dish out much sympathy. She tells me how bad she feels but she's already completed her 4 or 5 dishes she is taking. Don't take this wrong. I love my momma dearly. She is so good to me and my kids. She will do anything she can to help us. She has even offered to help clean my house. Mom has rheumatoid arthritis, OA, gout, and pseudogout. Mom is my hero, she won't let her illnesses break her. She is 81 years old and most days gets around better than I do. I think because she is such a strong force against her issues she just doesn't want to hear my complaints. I even feel bad for complaining to her about my aches and pains. However it is hard to not be able to vent or have someone's shoulder to lean on every once in a while. I guess that's how I ended up here, talking to you guys!

  I guarantee many of you know exactly what I mean when I say one good day = a bad day. In the end I think it was worth it. I know when this ache leaves my bathroom will be a source of pride because I did it! (With a teenagers help haha)

  In case you're wondering I did get my food items ready for church. My husband lended a hand with that.

  Ankylosing Spondylitis - a give and take relationship! It gave me enough energy to clean but then it took all my energy today. What a crazy life!!

  Hugs AS warriors!

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